So much in fact that I dressed up like him for three Halloweens in a row. It was a little obsessive. (Apparently I expected you to use your imagination and see those imaginary blades coming out of my knuckles).
But, man this guy, (Hugh Jackman not Wolverine) wrecked me ONCE AGAIN. In December when I sat and watched his latest movie: The GREATEST SHOWMAN, the re-imagined story of P.T. Barnum's Circus....WHICH is a musical...
And I know, I know... I just lost a bunch of you reading this. But bear with me.
I've seen it three times, and the soundtrack has been on REPEAT in our house for months.
(My kids constantly singing and dancing around is one of my favorite things lately).
This movie MOVED me. It changed me....and really it encouraged me for my future.
Here's why.
It's a magical story of a dreamer. (I might be a wee bit of a dreamer myself... so I relate).
This film was about someone who visualized something beyond himself. He didn't have much, but he took what he had and spun it into a wonderful, colorful, world-changing reality for all those around him,especially the misfits and marginalized of society (perhaps one of my favorite themes in the story).
Yes, he did it with a song, dance and a cane....and for some that's a bit cheesy...but if the music doesn't move you, then the story will, if you let it.
Here's how it moved me.
As I sat in my little sanctuary, the movie theater, munching on kettle corn, I slipped my hand into my wife's... as the tears streamed down my face.
I felt understood. I felt alive! I felt desperate for this kind of life. (It also happened to parallel real life things happening in my life and work and future, more on that soon). It felt like my story, the story that God has been writing in my heart since I can remember.
The movie tugged on my heartstrings because of the love between this husband and wife and their daughters. Gosh, I never wanted to start a circus more in my life. But that's not the point of this blog reflection.
Here's the point.
I've come to realize, even more during these months since I saw the moive. Not only am I a dreamer, but I am an optimist...and to a fault sometimes (I can easily idealize and hope TOO much that it can feel like I'm not living in reality).
But living with such hope and expectation keeps me alive when I feel put in a box, when I feel creatively starved, when I feel I've hit my ceiling. Dreaming and thinking about the future will always ground me and lift me up when I fall into dark emotional pits or seasons of uncertainty. Maybe it's my coping mechanism!!?
*********************
Here's some meaningful lyrics that I've been singing over and over.
I close my eyes and I can see
The world that's waiting up for me
That I call my own
Through the dark, through the door
Through where no one's been before
But it feels like home
They can say, they can say it all sounds crazy
They can say, they can say I've lost my mind
I don't care, I don't care, so call me crazy
We can live in a world that we design
'Cause every night I lie in bed
The brightest colors fill my head
A million dreams are keeping me awake
I think of what the world could be
A vision of the one I see
A million dreams is all it's gonna take
A million dreams for the world we're gonna make
**************************
This is how I see it! Dream about the world you want to see. Create your destiny don't just sit on the couch and pray about it. Set goals and run after your dreams. Do NOT give up on them!
Being you, living beyond your brokenness, self-imposed labels or societally imposed identities is one of the greatest challenges but most fulfilling decisions you can ever make. (and you should definitely watch this behind the scenes clip of the making of the film and music).
But keep this in mind.... these dreams come with a cost. The journey is full of pain fear, temptation, and even sadness for the heartbreak that comes with pursuing those dreams. You might have to give up sleep, jobs, homes or the expectations others (or even you) have for your life.
And it's not always easy being married to someone like me..(cough cough)..I mean Hugh Jackman (P.T. Barnum)...because it feels just like WALKING ON A TIGHTROPE. Just ask Michelle Williams (playing Charity Barnum), who had a wonderful song and portrayed the complexity and hardship of partnering with the PT Barnun, dreamer-types.
So, I'm grateful for Hugh Jackman and those Wolverine claws that he's dug down deep into me. I'm thankful for good stories. and yes, I'm thankful for cheesy musicals.
Tomorrow I'm going to share more in depth...but I have some big changes coming in my life for our future.
Check back here for the story.
No comments:
Post a Comment