Friday, February 15, 2008

Sex, Love, and More

Tonight was cool. Once a month (or so) we have what is called a DISCIPLESHIP night: A gathering to discuss relevant issues for the Christ-following young adult. With some good pizza and Starbucks' Frapps on hand we went after tonight's Topic:


It was so cool to partner in ministry with my wife Wendy and share (in our crammed living room) with a bunch of our young adults, all who are trying to figure out God's design and authentically live for him in our community. I love it and I was so proud to see these men and women taking their relationships and purity seriously.

I could have gone all night talking about these issues--and teaching from my own baggage, but we have Isella's internal clock to deal with early in the morning so we obviously had to end.

Here's some of our notes from the night

Overarching concept: God has called us to a life that honors him. If we know God’s love, our actions will reflect who he is in all of life and all of our relationships. God’s design from the beginning has been one man and one woman in an emotionally, sexually, and spiritually intimate relationship (one flesh) called marriage. We as God’s followers must seek to understand God’s design and live it out faithfully as a means of loving him and loving others (Great Commandment) in healthy community. This is known as a standard (Bull’s eye) that we seek after not because we have to, but because we want to, knowing that it honors God but also has benefits for us and those we are in relationship with. We have an absolute truth from God’s word. Although not every explicit detail has been spelled out for us in scripture we can appropriate God’s truth practically in our life and relationships (and help each other, too)! Remember our life is about experiencing (feeling) and choosing love and this puts us in partnership with God. This puts us accountable to have discussions with our friends and dating partners to prevent from creating bonds (physically, emotionally, and spiritually) that were only meant for marriage---and a good, healthy, God-honoring relationship is worth waiting for!

FLAME-Rob Bell Video recap: Three types of love in the Hebrew: Friendship, Commitment (marriage), and Erotic. We need all three for healthy sexuality! See Video below (10 minutes in length)

Verses we referenced tonight:
Genesis 3
Song of Solomon
Romans 7
1 Corinthians 6
Galatians 6
Ephesians 4 & 5
1 Thessalonians 4

Resources used in our conversation:
(All of them and are available on for under $15).

What’s the Difference? Manhood and Womanhood defined according to the Bible By John Piper

Relationships by Drs Les and Leslie Parrot

Boy Meets Girl & I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris

Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman

Boundaries in dating by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend

Love is a Choice (Letting Go of unhealthy relationships) by Hemfelt, Minirith, Meier

Thrill of the Chaste, Finding fulfillment while keeping your clothes on by Dawn Eden

Should I Get Married? By M. Blaine Smith

Love, Sex, and Lasting Relationships by Chip Ingram

Broken Image by Leanne Payne

All of these books have aided in our relationship before marriage and continue to be resources we reference for others and continue to go back to for ourselves in different ways! To those who participated tonight, thank you! Wendy and I loved it and we will continue to pray for you. Don't forget to take another (or deeper) look into the packet with all it's articles and worksheets. There are great pages in there for those needed healing of past sexual sin, those wondering about current compatability, and those considering marriage. These are great conversation starters and reasons to pray together as a community! Spur one another on toward love and good deeds (purity!)!

God is Good! God's design for relationships is Good. God loves relationships!
God loves sex (in marriage)!!!

1 comment:

Denver Dating said...

When you just try to reform somebody, no matter who he or she is, you will certainly hurt them. Though Simon is popular in the American Idol, I think we should be Paula when we get along with others. And we should know that everyone is the unique in this world. So, please stop finding the substitute. It is unfair and it is hurt.