We had a great Winter Retreat with our young adult community this past weekend (video coming soon). I had some good time connecting with people and most importantly with God. One of my prayers was to live and minister out of God's truth. Sometimes my insecurites and people-pleasing tendencies lead me to "feel" unloved when my contributions aren't acknowledged. I think it's a natural human issue but it's a sign of being unhealthy when we depend on the affirmations of others to feel loved or worthy. It's putting our value in what we do or what others think of us instead in how much we are loved by God. I just don't want my ego boosted I want to be solid in my identity as God's son. So I prayed about this and asked God to remind me that I serve him for his glory, not my own, and for his affirmation not the kudos of others (even though it's always great to feel appreciated, I just don't want to be codependant on it or pity myself if it's not there). So I prayed and chose to focus on God and I was doubly blessed. For one, I had some great conversations on the retreat and left feeling genuinely loved and love for others. 2-Sunday night I received a card from Leo and Ruby ( a great mentor couple in our church family) sharing one of my favorite truths on this very subject, and 3-I woke up this morning to my car looking like this. (totally anonymous by the way!)
Humbled, thankful, and feeling loved and affirmed by God and community.